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Family and Life

First we Celebrated Mom on Mother's Day; now it's the old man's turn! This is where we Celebrate Dad all year long. It consists of four pages: Father's Day: How it All Began and how it was established. A Father is... : a list of familiar fatherly attributes. Dadsense: the sequel to "Total Momsense" by Christian comedienne Anita Renfroe. Dawn of the Dadisms: famous fatherly quotes. Dawn of the Dadisms by Rich Rodriguez from other sources This is our annual list of dadisms, those famous quotes we heard our fathers say when we were growing up, or are catching ourselves say if we are now dads ourselves. To give credit where credit is due, many of these dadisms are from the Parenting Resource Center of Austin, Minnesota and Father's Day Celebration in India. The new additions are courtesy of the message boards at DisneyFamily.com and other sources. So how many times have you heard dear ol' Dad quote any of the following?

New additions for 2011:

“I may not always be right, but I’m never wrong!”

“Don’t do as I do, do as I tell you to.”

“How can I soar like an eagle when I am surrounded by turkeys?”

"Just accept that on some days, you're the pigeon, and on some days, you're the statue."

"Drive carefully. It's not only cars that can be 'recalled' by their Maker."

"We're not lost, we're taking the scenic route!"

“On a dog sled team, like in life, if you’re not the lead dog then the scenery seldom changes.”

"If you don't like what your mother cooked, Burger King is on the corner. Hope you have money, or learn to cook."

To his son after a breakup with a girlfriend: "How long are you going to let her control you?"

"If you lend someone $20 and never see that person again it was probably worth it."

"We could learn a lot from crayons... Some are sharp, some are pretty, and some are dull. Some have weird names, and all are different colors, but they all have to live in the same box."

All the other dadisms:

"No, we're not there yet."

"We're not lost. I'm just not sure where we are."

"You call that noise MUSIC?"

"Didn't you just get your allowance?"

"You're grounded until the end of the world, or until I say different, whichever comes first."

"Whatever you're thinking... don't do it."

"Am I talking to a brick wall?"

"Shape up or ship out... and there ain't no boats leaving!"

"Here's the deal..."

"Don't give me any of your lip, young lady."

"I told you, keep your eye on the ball."

"I feel for you, but I can't reach you from here."

"Young lady, you'd better straighten up--and DON'T roll your eyes at me!

Angry teenager: "I'll never speak to you again!"
Dad: "Promises, Promises!" or "Is that a threat, or a promise?" or "Famous last words!"

On giving us the car keys: "Have it home before midnight... and that tank had better be full."

Dad: "C'mon! You throw like a girl."
His tomboy daughter: "But Dad, I AM a girl!"
Dad: "That's no good reason for an excuse."

"Go ask your mother."

"I wasn't asleep; I was watching that channel!"

When asked by his kid to buy him or her a cell phone: "RME!" or "LOL!"

"When I was a kid, we were so poor I ate dirt was glad to have it!"

"Don't make me pull over the car!"

"Always say 'please' and 'thank you'. That way, you get more."

"Sit up straight, knucklehead!"

"What do I look like, Bank of America?"

"Sorry. Not negotiable."

To his son: "Son, don't ever get married. And tell that to your kids."

Again to his son: "Big boys don't cry."

To his daughter: "Men are like buses. Just wait on the corner and another one will come along."

Again to his daughter: "You know you're always gonna to be Daddy's little girl."

"I hope you learned something from this."

"Fatherhood is not a popularity contest."

"The couch is not a jungle gym."

"I never had a car when I was your age, and I turned out just fine."

And if you find yourself quoting any or all of the above:

"Oh no! I'm turning into my father!"

And we know, deep down inside, just like mom, he bugs us because he really loves us.

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